Same-sex Attraction

Same-sex attraction is something that is becoming more and more common throughout the world. Many people have different opinions on the matter that can lead us to judge those that have it. I learned a lot this last week about what actually makes people turn to their same sex to cope with life that I would like to share so that we can better understand what causes it and how we should act toward those that have it.

Same-sex attraction can start in youth. It can start also after 16 years of marriage. It just depends on how the child or person is treated. For example, when a boy is 4 years old and loves to play with dolls, what are the reactions of the parents or friends of that child? Are they supportive to them to explore? Or are the parents criticizing and banning certain gender-oriented objects from the child to make sure their child isn't different? There are a couple of things that contribute to someone turning out "gay":

• The number of chromosomes the child is born with (variable x)
• Temperament
• Activities or preferences the child likes to engage in: Are they gender typical or are they A typical?
• At this point, the child/adult is excluded, made fun of etc. and comes to a conclusion such as "I am different from boys/girls"
• Then the person experiments with how they feel with their same sex and how they feel around them. For example, when boy 1 comes in contact with the most popular boy in school (boy 2), if boy 1 feels sweaty, nervous around boy 2 then boy 1 usually associates that as being attracted to boy 2 and comes to a conclusion that boy 1 must be gay.
• Finally, the person experiments by sexualizing himself/herself and keeps the notion that he/she is "gay" and uses everything that they have experienced in their past as proof that they were either born that way or have always been that way.

These attributions are critical and must be examined when understanding same sex attraction. If we have fears about our OWN children having such an issue in their lives, we must understand how to handle it.

I am a firm believer in making all people feel loved. "Love the sinner and not the sin" is what Jesus taught. We can help those that are struggling with this by the way we treat them. We must work on the way WE treat them first before we can help anybody else. Let us treat them with love and respect, and with time the Spirit will help them to discover who they are and their own personal purposes that they have in this life.